Emotions may run high during holiday family gatherings. Sacramento County Behavioral Health Services provide a myriad of services to help residents navigate mental health struggles during the holidays. Photo courtesy of Anchiy via iStock

SACRAMENTO REGION, CA (MPG) - The holiday season is most often described as joyful, warm and full of celebration, but many people experience something more complex, like dreading gatherings knowing they can stir up stress, old patterns or emotional triggers and even intensify the grief of missing a loved one that’s passed.

If this time of year feels complicated, that’s perfectly normal. The holidays come with expectations, routines and memories that can heighten emotions.

Let’s unpack why emotions run high in December and look at tools to deal with complex situations during the holidays.

Some factors that may contribute to complex emotions in December and getting triggered include: stepping into old family roles, feeling pressure to keep the peace, encountering conversations that feel sensitive or overwhelming, missing someone deeply during gatherings, being reminded of past losses or difficult years, old tensions, feeling judged or misunderstood, unresolved conflicts and changes in relationships

Any of these factors might lead to a triggering event where someone feels signs of irritability and withdrawing feelings. These reactions are normal. It’s the body responding to a situation that feels intense.

Here are some tools to stay grounded in these moments.

Take pauses: A short walk, a moment outside, or even a trip for a water refill can give space for the body and mind to reset.

Set boundaries gently: Boundaries are an act of self-care, not conflict. It is okay to say, “I’d rather not talk about that right now,” or “I need a moment,” or “I’m going to step outside for a bit.”

Reach out to someone supportive: A quick text or call can make a person feel less alone.

Practice grounding: Noticing five things, place feet firmly on the ground and take slow breaths to regulate the nervous system.

Permission to feel: You don’t have to force cheerfulness. It’s okay to feel sad, tired, hopeful or anything in between.

Reflecting after the gathering: When things quiet down, take a moment to reflect and check in. What felt comforting? What felt difficult? What do I need moving forward?

Grief doesn’t follow a schedule, and the holidays can magnify feelings of loss. Reminders appear everywhere – traditions, music, foods, photos and empty chairs that used to be filled.

Some ways to honor a loved one might include lighting a candle in their memory, cooking their favorite dish, sharing stories with friends or family, writing them a letter or creating a small ritual that brings comfort.

There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Your journey is yours.

Family dynamics can be complicated and grief can feel heavy, especially during the holiday season. If this time of year brings emotional overwhelm, talking with someone can make a real difference, whether that’s a friend, community member, support group or a behavioral health professional.

Sacramento County Behavioral Health Services provide a myriad of services to help residents navigate mental health struggles during the holidays.

Sacramento County’s CORE Community Wellness Centers offer drop-in centers for mental health resources. For more information or to locate centers, visit: dhs.saccounty.gov/BHS/Pages/Adult-Mental-Health/CORE%20Program.aspx

Behavioral Health Services-Screening and Coordination (BHS-SAC) offers access and coordination of services in Sacramento County. For more information, visit: dhs.saccounty.gov/BHS/Pages/BHS-SAC.aspx

Mental Health America offers a variety of mental health and crisis resources. Visit mhanational.org/crisis-services/ for more information.

The NAMI Support Line offers emotional support, mental health information and resources. For more information, visit www.nami.org/support-education/nami-helpline/

Everyone deserves peace, connection and care this holiday season.

If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of self-harm or hopelessness, you can call or text 988 for immediate support or visit the county’s Mental Health Urgent Care Clinic, 2130 Stockton Boulevard, Building 300, Sacramento, CA or call (916) 520-2460.